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NOSTOS

by Otium

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1.
2.
New Flesh 07:17
Up there those diamonds, are all alone for eternity, all that buzzing static, makes my skin disintegrate in the air. so take me to your house, to the basement, where your skins are found. I’m shaking, so put me to sleep. 
 _______________ 
 Here comes the new flesh starting to mushroom out the whispers to turn to shouts now we laughing jay and i’m glad that you're around somehow it’s more profound let’s walk outside to where cars are blood-cells of the road tonight 
 While we are dancing and the fireworks explode I start feeling so old. Now i am crying out for my innocence to rise but it’s only loneliness I find. “come lay in the grass and i’ll listen to you as the night goes past” 
 Maddie my mother is taking care of me I’m just an infant, in a bad dream. Scott you have gone blind from rolling in the light. 
 John is pensive, sitting on the truck, being the lonely moon and Jolene you’re coming to pick me up and put me in your crystal room and she was right , about her basement where those skins are found I’m shaking so put me to sleep.
3.
The Wind 06:25
Did you know? The Wind is silence, is silently silencing? Less your ears hear it hissin Less the buildings start to groan Less the trees leaf it thrashing Less the mountains start to moan Less the windchime in its purpose shows the ghost in its throne. 
 Buried with care, I was scattered, I was cut like a curl, Blown by The Winds a harlequin of a memories timeless tattering, yet my dreams are different things than us unconscious and unmanageable. I can't help the way my feelings bosom bleed into the tangible. I'm split so you know, split so you know, split so you know, you know, you know Oh Margot Come Margot, or Meghan, come kitten, my love Where are you, my memory; a pale woman's hug I see you in the shower while I'm singing you songs And you're laughing and you're smiling as you try and sing along And you know that I'm scared, of the next day, Of not seeing you warm, in the doorway where you'd let me in. you sneaking kiss I'd grab you with my weary arms my dreamy dawn my still life my still love where did you go, where did you go? go. go. go. 
 Oh Margot. 
 Meet me where I met you in the triangle park, hop the fence between our first kiss and ill take you for a walk, you'll see me the next morning ill be groggy and bare and then your roommates will leave you without a bedroom to share 
 So I'm taking you in, for this beginning, And while the moments did pass well the memories came some merrily made and easily unavoidable the meaning was late its the saddest of fates cause happiness is unacknowledgeable, a confusing escape in both the ways of holding on and letting go. Im letting go im letting go, go. go. Im so sorry Oh Margot
4.
Who is that wisper in? Sounds like a child singing something but where on earth is it coming from? Cause i’m out here on my own Cause i’m out here on my own Cause i’m out here on my own my own Here I am a starved foolish man but you’re hearing my words all wrong In vain I complain to myself The Pages Printed but they’re just laying there on the shelf are they pulling you up or letting you down? Are they your friends or just part of the crowd Tell me you’ll miss me that you’ll still think of me as family and when the day comes i won’t be saying that i’m out here on my own. am i out here on my own? am i out here on my own? my own. There you are a line in the song but i’m hearing your words all wrong Am I just a thorn in times side? to be plucked out annoyed and causally laid aside or am I a rock that's bending the stream either way i’ll be worn to dust eventually.
5.
Delzetta 05:16
it’s in the agates scattered glowing in the drive, 
that trails past the mutton and star 
to where i’d dream in the jay trees i’d climb 
then muse at milk thistles growin' long in the blinds, 
amongst the rolling wind that caused the corn fields to sing with the... Peek the mason jars lined against the wall
 in the basement where Delzetta would sew
 running through the old family bus
 that’s curled with ivy and littered with rust
 in the cement of the barn that pens the pigs and their sows we’d pet all the cat’s kids with our toes, What is this dream? What is this dream? What is this dream i’ve had in which i’m always sad when it’s over? it’s in the lone tree that stands amongst the corn, 
in the sheep's call and the cocks early horn, 
is the emptiness: a memory, a child. 
In the wrinkles of the shallows In the bulbous and the wild.
 Lid your cobalt eyes and breathe the air of your child that sees strength in your motherly mind. What is this dream? What is this dream? 
What is this dream i’ve had in which i’m always sad when it’s over.
6.
Come and play The quartz says to me as I cross my legs next to the tv screen, so excited Grainy cathode rays. My eyes are gleaming with the starlight pixels of a video, dream But who is this I'm remembering? In those different skins, I find it sometimes in that twinning thing always unbidden Still find it in the cracks of The Crystal Pixel The light is getting late, The game becomes his life becomes the boy becomes the one being, Played. forced sousveillance. Who's to ever say? That our ties to conscious life aren't really lies to keep us finding out that we're sitting there in that predawn lair. But who is this I'm remembering? In those different skins, I find it somehow in that twinning thing always unbidden Still find it in the cracks of The Crystal Pixel "In the waking world someday thou may recall this island that memory must be the real dream world Come on let us awaken together”
7.
Motions Motions of a Life Motions Motions of a Life As a child so innocently exploring, the world had a mystery you hope to regain in growing up we lose all of these Motions Motions of a Life It’s the slow change that makes us forget that were aging, while memories are photos so slowly degrading ghosts between all these Motions Motions of a Life I bet you know what your reaping but i wonder what you sow it’s something that your giving off that something's a shadow the shallow movement of the tides, a seamless dancer of time, it unwinds The fallow bellows of the night are breathing the destiny of your life, of your life reprised
8.
When you wish upon a star in late night reveries, others are wishing too, on your star, but don’t feel down, the dream you’ve bound to future memories are still unfolding child, the stars they are connecting all of you to an immovable luminous truth, feel your coming youth. The crickets pulse the night wakes up a child in it’s eyes, looking skyward. to Dahn the infinite on wishing lips he wispers to the spark “let it bind me, and i’ll go blindly stepping into the dark. The pinprick in the velvet sends a dreaming ray of light to his bedroom, the boy in my life. The curtains part his hairs stand up the windows open wide lets the breeze in as he’s sleeping the boy goes off floating into the night. magically, absurdly, Orion! Waking. Where am I where's my bed? A needle's point is poised above my arm again Feeling. Like I've done something wrong. Yet I feel strangely proud, as my head it starts to fog. Facing. A face I thought I knew, but it's empty, of the hearth behind its eyes of blue. Strapped up. As the walls they peel away, I'm high above the world I love, the friends I've left are saved from me. be.
9.

credits

released July 4, 2016

Written, Recorded, Performed, and Mixed by Otium
Final Mix by Geoff Strasser
Mastered by Sarah Register

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Otium 北九州市, Japan

"Memory is the star in which we used to wish, the dream we lose after waking, the key we hold but cannot turn."

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